Confessions of a Personal Trainer

 

  1. I’m always nervous before the first session with a new client, even though it might not show. I’m always worried you’ll be the one who provides me with the puzzle I can’t solve; the needs I can’t meet; the questions for which I have no answers.
  2. Your super baggy clothes don’t do your body justice. I know why you’re wearing them, but no matter your size or body type, form-fitting clothing looks better. Trust me. And, they make your workout easier. That t-shirt that’s gaping all around you? It’s going to be flapping up where you don’t want it in a few minutes.
  3. I’m seemingly the one in charge during your session, bossing you around and all that, but I take my cues from you. You’re chatty? I’m chatty. You’re avoiding eye contact? I position myself where we aren’t forced to look at each other. You’re in the mood to crack jokes? I’ll laugh and match you one-for-one. We get along so well! I’m a chameleon because I want you to be comfortable with me.
  4. I have a very strong core, but my six-pack only occasionally makes an appearance. I know ex
    actly what to do to ‘take it to the next level’ to lose that last bit of body fat. Guess what – I don’t do those things. I’m not any different from most of you when it comes to dedication and commitment; I’m not perfect. I’m a work in progress too.
  5. I am not certified to give you specific nutritional advice, but when you ask me about changing your diet, I think “you know which foods are healthy and which foods aren’t.” You’re not being honest with yourself about your diet. It’s ok, that makes you like 90% of us. Which leads nicely into #6…. 
    Good thing I love burpees.

    Good thing I love burpees.

     

  6. I sometimes eat fast food, and I don’t feel guilty about it. But I might hide the evidence so my family doesn’t give me shit.
  7. I don’t know how many reps you’re going to do until you start doing them. I’m going to base my decision on your level of discomfort and struggle.  And….

    I know why you forget your water bottle.

    I know why you forget your water bottle.

  8. I know when you’re faking it in hopes I’ll tell you to do fewer reps.
  9. I know that you “forget” your water bottle so you have an excuse to wander away from me a bit. ( I don’t blame you for that.)
  10. Hanes t-shirts are undershirt, not exercise clothing. When that thing is loaded with a half-gallon of sweat and see-through? Seriously…  gross.
  11. Speaking of gross, if I teach in the morning and again in the afternoon, I probably won’t shower. With my exercise-heavy schedule, I’d be showering twice a day, every day, and my skin and hair can’t take it. Not to mention…  ANNOYING. Don’t worry, I do a sniff test and wash the important parts. (TMI?) (*shrug*)
  12. I know you can do more than you do, and I know you can do more than you think you can do. All of you.  All. Of. You.

    MIL

    My mother-in-law tries a side plank. BOOM.

 

This post was inspired by Gina at the Fitnessista!

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